It’s time to make out — it’s International Kissing Day! Can’t make it to Kissimmee, Fla.? Fan of Henry Kiss-inger? Either way, we’ve got seven kisses you should share.
I’ve got posters on the wall,
My favorite rock group, KISS.
I’ve got Ace Frehley.
I’ve got Peter Criss
Waiting there for me — yes, I do.
— Weezer, “In the Garage”
Tongues. Monochromatic makeup. Shredding a wicked axe. Calling Dr. Love. “Knights in Satan’s Service.” Sparkles, stars, and parties. All of these things and more constitute the legendary rock band, KISS. They, like you, want to rock and roll all night and party every day. And this “kiss” is not just a band, they’re a movement. They’ve inspired LARPers and Role Models, Detroit and Weezer, a reality show (ugh), and an entire army, making them the most legendary “kiss” of all time. So share a KISS today — with tongue:
- “Kiss From A Rose” by Seal
There was a time when John Major and Bill Clinton ran the free world. There was a time when Jim Carrey told riddles. And there was a time when you said you’d love Batman Forever. This time was 1995, and the more you got, the stranger it felt. Yea-eah. The song topped the charts and won Song of the Year, and the album of the same name won the Grammy in its category, too. For the ’90s fan in all of us, feel free to share this kiss. (From a rose.) (On the gray.)
- A Thimble, Peter Pan
“He took Mrs. Darling’s kiss with him. The kiss that had been for no one else Peter took quite easily. Funny. But she seemed satisfied.” — J. M. Barrie, Peter Pan
“Peter, I should like to give you a kiss.”
[Peter holds his hand out]
“Don’t you know what a kiss is?”
“I shall know when you give me one.” — Peter Pan(2003)
“I shall give her a kiss.”
“No. No, Peter. No buttons. No thimbles. I couldn’t bear to see Moira’s heart to be broken when she finds she can’t keep you.”
“No. I mean a real kiss.” — Hook, 1991
All this has happened before, and it will all happen again. — Peter Pan (1953)
Keep It Simple, Stupid!
Pro Tip: It’s the only kiss appropriate to share with a coworker. The “KISS Principle” was first coined by Kelly Johnson, and it can stand for many things. Keep it simple and sincere. Keep it short and sweet. Keep it simple and straightforward, and many other variations. Give this “kiss” to any overly complicated coworker or colleague. They might not want it now, but they’ll be sure to thank you later. Problem solved. Smooches!
Come to think of it, here’s a kiss you might not want to share. If we’re to believe Urban Dictionary, “kissajeria” is a serious illness, wherein the diseased person kisses everyone in sight. Luckily, kissajeria only occurs in the young, drunk, and insecure. Here’s a video of the disease, with Hootie and the Blowfish’s “I Only Wanna Be With You” playing appropriately in the background.
- The Kiss of Death
Making out with and then killing people. Is this really how you want to spend your holiday? “The Kiss of Death” may refer to several things: Judas’s betrayal of Jesus Christ (if you’re into The Bible); the Nicolas Cage and Samuel L. Jackson1995 remake of a 1947 film of the same name; a Jadakiss or Motorhead album. Best use of “kiss of death” comes from the former Soviet Union, where KGB members hid handguns in lipstick. True story.
- V-J Day in Times Square
One of the most famous photographs of Americana, V-J Day in Times Square was snapped on August 14, 1945 by Alfred Eisenstaedt. When the United States declared victory over Japan, there were worldwide parties in the streets. If that’s not an international kiss worth sharing, nothing is. And because it’s a whole new century, here’s a video of two famous dudes mugging down. XOX — now kiss off!