Good news, everyone: Prometheus hits theaters today, and it’s time to celebrate with yet another Internet article about movies! As Prometheus is a prequel to Ridley Scott’s classic Alien, we thought we’d look at which other classic movies out there actually deserve a prequel. Here are seven of them.
Lord of the Rings
Prequel Deserved: The Hobbit
And it’s a good thing, too. This particular prequel exists, has finished filming, and debuts later this year. Movie buffs and fantasy geeks everywhere will have their chance to return to The Shire, and should be supremely excited. But we prefer the Leonard Nimoy version.
Passion of the Christ
Prequel Deserved: The Old Testament
As if The Ten Commandments and The Last Temptation of Christ weren’t enough. The release of Passion of the Christ gave us media arcs ad nauseum, and we were left wanting more. Did you make jokes for a month at the expense of your favorite Christian? Good. Now imagine the mileage you’ll get from a vengeful God.
There Will Be Blood
Prequel Deserved: There Might Be Blood Later
Where did Daniel Plainview come from? Only the most dubious science can prove he was born in that well. In There Might Be Blood Later, we’d see the young Daniel Plainview, just as Upton Sinclair never intended. Psychology fans everywhere would enjoy a trip through the nature and nurture that created the complex character. And with the half-hearted title promise of violence at some point, there’s no reason not to make this film.
How Stella Got Her Groove Back
Prequel Deserved: How Stella Originally Lost Her Groove
Because inquiring minds want to know. And because we need some Whoopi in our lives — those Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit video tapes are wearing out.
Back to the Future
Prequel Deserved: Forward From the Past
If where they’re going, they don’t need roads — we really want to go there. In Forward From the Past, we’d see a young Doc Brown, mad science-ing his way through life. Throw in some ill-explained alien warfare (Doc Brown versus Commander Kruge, anyone?), and you’ve got a bigger, better sci-fi summer tentpole than Prometheus.
Prequel Deserved: The Student
We don’t care that Ben is schtupping the mother of the girl with whom he falls in love. If the recent graduate has so much sex and drama in his life post-college, we want to know what his glory days were like. Was he a reporter for the college newspaper? Was he in a fraternity? Was he a ladies man? Did he sleep with any of his unhappy, aging female professors? Were they hotter than Anne Bancroft? Important questions deserve important answers, Ben Braddock.
Prequel Deserved: Mildly Amusinga
If animation and classical music are your bag, no doubt you love Disney’s Fantasia movies. And who wouldn’t want to see more? In Mildly Amusinga, the Disney characters tackle some of the most boring classical music of all time. No Pines of Rome, no supernatural Socerer’s Apprentice antics — just Mickey Mouse grocery shopping to elevator music.